There I said it.
Indeed, cougarism is
the word these days. Older women with younger men, there's just a shady excitement to it like eating a forbidden fruit, an unspoken naughtiness that such combination exudes, an illicit discovery we crave to learn more about!
Yes, Demi Moore has done it. So has Madonna. And Mariah Carey. And Jennifer Aniston, and Drew Barrymore, and Kim Cattrall, Cher, Elizabeth Taylor, etc. Cougar is an urban term given to a woman who pursues much younger men. Wikipedia goes as far as specifying a
cougar as a woman who sexually pursues men who are at least eight years her junior. Wow, strong words. But what used to be a social taboo and since been glorified by Hollywood -- well then again, doesn't everything get popularised this way these days? Yesteryear's restrains have since turned into victorious conquests and for some women! Hallelujah!
I definitely see this cougar trend growing among my friends. There's always a certain inner-circle cheeky smile that lights up their faces when I get them to talk about their relationship with their younger men. It's hard to pinpoint what it really is but it's like they know something we don't. As if one has to be initiated into the Cougar Club before she can learn the secret thrill of such relationship. It's intriguing, it's alluring, it's tempestuous! Here are a few things they've shared about their cougar relationship.
1) Eager to please
Younger men are eager to please their older girlfriends. They show more attention to the women. Whatever the younger men lack in financial sense, they make up for it by showering the women with special sweet surprises and aplenty attention to their every detail in life. I have to agree with this because older men then to believe they can buy their way into the women's world. And that whatever we need, they can satisfy by buying for us. Well, sometimes what women really need is just attention. Undivided attention from their all-so-important career, or golf/poker nights/beers. With younger men, their older girlfriends are always their priority in life. And most of the time, that's all a girl needs.
2) More respectful
Like shadow that comes with light, older men have inflated egos that comes their age and knowledge. With younger men, they acknowledge that their older girlfriends may be more worldly and thus tend to be more respectful to their opinions, ideas and perspectives. Younger men look up to older women, and shower them with the respect they deserve! For women, it's tiring, not to mention boring, dealing with older pompous men all the time. R.E.S.P.E.C.T, guys. You'll win if you can do that more.
3) Younger, Hotter, please
Like this t-shirt that says "Go for younger men. You might as well. They never mature anyway." That's right! Like men who always prefer younger, hotter girls, women also prefer young hot bods over saggy belly and balding head too. Younger men dresses well, put in effort with their hair, hygiene, skincare, lifestyle, etc. Older men unfortunately mistakenly think that tough and rough is sexy. And that unshaven and unkempt reveals their manliness. I'm just gonna say it once: NO, IT IS NOT. Gimme a metrosexual guy, I'll show you what is sexy.
4) I already have a fatherI don't need another father figure in my life, thankyouverymuch. There is a difference between feeling secure with a man and feeling paternal with a man. We are confident, accomplished women who knows what we want in life. We don't need our older boyfriends to judge us, set rules for our lives, or restrict my lifestyle. Pussycat Dolls's song Hush Hush says it well:
I never needed you for pointing out my wrongs
I never needed you for judgment
I never needed you to question what I spend
I never ask for help
I take care of myself
I never needed your corrections
On everything from how I act to what I sayWhy is that that only older men judge their girlfriends on who they hang out with, what time they should get home, how they should do things, what they wear, etc? I have a friend who openly declares his preference for older women. He was over at my place before we went clubbing the other day when I asked him for opinion on my ultra short dress. He said that there is no such thing as a dress that's too short. Or a cleavage that's too much. Bless him! Younger men really do know how to make a woman feel more beautiful!
5) Younger men makes women feel youngI still like clubbing, extreme sports, spontaneous travel, dancing in the rain, staying up all night, etc. Every now and then, I like to wreck some havoc. But older men are just too conservative, too proper, and most of all, too tired. Yes, they've been there, done that -- last decade. But I haven't! Why don't you have some fun with me too? In that aspect, younger men live life on the edge, seek fun in everything they do, and love with everything they have. And that is why women feel younger when they hang out with their younger boyfriends! Feel young, look young! Now beat that, SKII!
6) Less baggageThe last thing I need is to be a step-mom. Or dealing with a psychotic ex-girlfriend. Or those so-cliched emotional baggage. It's hard enough being a women. Let me be the only one in your life. Older men are often too jaded, too hard-heartened, too unwilling to love totally again. Well, girls, stop wasting time with such men. Find a fresh young thing and be the one that breaks his heart if you have to. But chances are you'll be in for treat for being his first love!
7) Sexually CompatibleA man's sexual peak is in his 20s and a woman in her 30s. This cougar-match will ensure equal bedroom desires. Also younger men are eager to show their older girlfriends they know what they are doing in bed. So they are eager to satisfy their women. Finally a man who puts our desires before theirs! God bless our younger men!
8) StaminaNeed I say more? 'nuff said. Yum!
I am neither advocating cougarism, or discouraging it. I applaud my cougar girlfriends, and totally respect my guy friends who prefers
MLIF.
Hello, Zac Efron! Hello, Chace Crawford. How do you
not be a cougar with these hot young bods perfect with those puppy eyes tempting you?
"The little blue box" shall not be exclusive to Tiffany&Co anymore. Gimme some Jimmy Choo blue boxes too!
I have always wondered how the ladies wearing niqab distinguish one friend from another. Is it just by the different abayas they are wearing? Or eye makeup (which I promise you, the Arab ladies does the best eye makeup in the world)? I've asked this question many times to many Arab friends but never got a satisfying answer. Usually the answer is "you just know". As for me, I only try to differentiate them by their abaya's blings or their handbags. So far it works... but once. I approached the wrong abaya-cloaked lady and spoke to her for several minutes before realising she was not the right person I was looking for. Blimey!
